[Antracis]

Zitat von TriVet

Um elf Uhr wird ja der/die diesjährige Friedensnobelpreisträger bekanntgegeben, und ich hoffe doch schwer, dass es nicht Trump sein wird.
Wie wird er wohl reagieren?
Norwegen den Krieg erklären?

Vermutlich wird er dann um High Noon mit einer Erklärung vor seine begeisterte Anhängerschaft treten


Thank you! Wow… what a crowd! What an incredible crowd. You know, every time I come out here, the fake news says, “Sir, it wasn’t that big.” But folks — look around. It’s massive. It’s always massive. Nobody gets crowds like this. Nobody!


*Jubel*

So… I just heard some news. You’re not gonna believe this — they gave the Nobel Peace Prize… to somebody else. Can you believe it? Not me! Can you believe it?


*empörte Buhrufe*

Yeah, I know. Total disgrace. Everybody’s saying — everybody — “Sir, you did more for peace than anybody, maybe in history.” They said it couldn’t be done. I did it. And they still gave it to somebody else. Disrespectful!

But that’s okay. Because, you know what I said? I said, “That’s fine. We’ll make our own prize. A better one. A bigger one. A beautiful one.” So tonight, I’m officially announcing the creation of the Trump Prize for Tremendous Peace and Greatness!


*hysterischer Jubel ...in rhythmisches "Trump-Price"-Geschreih mündend*

That’s right! Way better than the Nobel. The Nobel is — let’s be honest — it’s old, it’s tired, it’s very small. Tiny medal, tiny ideas.

My prize? Big! Gold. Real big gold. The best gold. American gold. Maybe even with diamonds, we’ll see.

People are already saying — “Sir, it’s going to be the most luxurious peace prize ever.” I said, “Of course it is — it’s got my name on it!”

*noch stärkerer Jubel*

And now, folks, this is big — really big — I’m proud to announce the very first recipient of the Trump Prize. And that recipient is…

*erwartungsvolle Stille*

ME!

*gewaltige Jubeleruption und hysterische Rufe: “TRUMP! TRUMP! TRUMP!”*

That’s right! Because nobody — and I mean nobody — could have come up with this idea. Only me. The genius idea. Tremendous idea. You have to be very stable, very smart to think of something like that.

The fake news will go crazy — they’ll say, “He gave himself the prize!” Yes, I did! Because I earned it! You think Sleepy Joe could come up with something like this? Not a chance.


Maybe next year, we’ll give one to Melania — she deserves it, she’s very beautiful — or maybe to Elon, maybe he will do some great stuff again in future, who knows. We’ll see what happens. But the first one — it had to be me.

And folks, let me tell you — the Trump Prize is going to be yuge. Everyone’s going to want it. The kings, the queens, the prime ministers — they’ll all call me, they’ll say, “Sir, how do I win your prize?” And I’ll say, “You have to be tremendous. You have to be a winner. You have to be like me!”

*menge rastet aus, viele anwesende Frauen und selbst einige heterosexuelle Männer fallen in Ohnmacht*


So thank you, everybody — we’ve done incredible things, truly incredible. We’ve built peace, we’ve built greatness, and now we’ve built the best prize the world has ever seen.

Thank you very much — God bless you, and God bless the United States of America!

*Tosende Menge “MAKE PEACE GREAT AGAIN!” verteilte Schilder werden hoch gehalten*



PS: Da war kein Spielraum mehr zu finden zwischen Original und Parodie